Is there such a thing as a perfect phone call?

per·fectadjective | ˈpərfikt | 1 having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics; as good as it is possible to be: life certainly isn't perfect at the moment | a perfect summer's day. • free from any flaw or defect in condition or quality; faultless: the equipment was in perfect condition. • precisely accurate; exact: a perfect circle. • highly suitable for someone or something; exactly right: with a little help you can create a room that is perfect for you | the perfect present for golfers everywhere. • Printing denoting a way of binding books in which pages are glued to the spine rather than sewn together. • dated thoroughly trained in or conversant with: she was perfect in French. 2 [attributive] absolute; complete (used for emphasis): a perfect stranger | all that Joseph said made perfect sense to me.    ******************************************Donald Trump says he made a perfect telephone call.  If you or I said that, the people around us would ask what comprises a perfect telephone  call.  They'd say something like, WTF is a perfect telephone call?

A call informing you that you won a million dollar lottery might be considered perfect.  A phone call in which you obtained  something you wanted might be successful. A phone call that elicits information you need might be productive.   But how can something as amorphous as a phone call be defined as perfect?  

The problem is not a matter of laboriously making a list of attributes that could comprise a perfect phone call.  If a term of language does not make much sense,  it may well be a language error:  "errors are thought of as indications of an incomplete learning, and that the speaker or hearer has not yet accumulated a language knowledge which can enable them to avoid linguistics misuse."  

In other words, the error might be yours if you have not enough vocabulary to understand what a competent user of language is saying.  Or it may be that the user of language doesn't know enough to make a competent statement.  In the case of Trump's "perfect phone call,"  the latter case applies.

Trump speaks in superlatives.  Everything he does or likes is the "greatest thing in the history of the world."  People he doesn't like and the things they do are "the worst disasters" that has visited the world.  Trump's use of language reveals a mind that has never progressed beyond its childish likes and dislikes.  He has never mustered the intelligence to rise above a juvenile ego. Consideration of what could comprise a perfect phone call is beyond his thought process.

Take a look at the key passage from the transcript of his "perfect" call to the leader of Ukraine:

The President: I would like you to do us a favor though because our country has been through a lot and Ukraine knows a lot about it. I would like you to find out what happened with this whole situation with Ukraine, they say Crowdstrike ... I guess you have one of your wealthy people … The server, they say Ukraine has it. There are a lot of things that went on, the whole situation. I think you’re surrounding yourself with some of the same people. I would like to have the Attorney General call you or your people and I would like you to get to the bottom of it. As you saw yesterday, that whole nonsense ended with a very poor performance by a man named Robert Mueller, an incompetent performance, but they say a lot of it started with Ukraine. Whatever you can do, it’s very important that you do it if that’s possible.

What is most notable about this passage is the absence of a coherent sentence.   While Trump is making reference to a number of matters, some of which involves a conspiracy theory proven false, not one sentence makes a clear predication.  This jumble of incoherent references and mangled grammar is part of a perfect telephone call?  Put yourself in the Ukrainian presidents shoes and between his ears and write down a list of the things Trump has referred to.  Then in a sentence write down exactly what he is requesting.  
In other words, make something coherent of what Trump is saying.   If you succeed let us know.

We all know that Trump wanted Mr. Zelenksy to make  public announce that his government was investigating Joe Biden and his son, but analyze that passage for its competence of communication.  Remember.  This is your president speaking.