Cliff, Fiscal, (as he is listed on the Army roll call) and Sandy Hook have inspired the devotees of the great retardation movement to go into a frenzy, a festival of perverse stupidity.
Let us begin with Cliff. He was the creation of a government that failed the people to begin with. When the wards in the sand box can't play nice together, they make up shit. This time they named it Cliff. Now they would like to get rid of Cliff but they still can't play nice together. They squabble over who gets to hoard the toys of power and they throw sand and shit in each others eyes, and if the mentally impaired were not allowed to bear arms, there wouldn't be many gun owners in Congress. Particulary, those who claim they are bringing the entire country down as an assertion of their principles.
And then comes Sandy Hook. As a nation which comprises five percent of the world's population, it owns 50 percent of the world's guns. The national slogan is not "In God We Trust." It has been replaced by the sandbox rule that "He Who Owns the Most Toys Wins." That is not what is printed on our currency because no one has figured out how to print it on a dime, a penny, or a nickel.
A few people have suggested that if some Americans do not want to worship at the church of the holy gun and be thought of as a country that worships with rituals of violence and greed, maybe there should be some regulation of guns. This really caused a frenzy of the faithful and those they selected to represent them in the sand box. The alarm is that someone is after their toys. Their sacraments. Their only claim to power and consequence. Fuck the idea of voting. They have organized into the great sandbox revolt. You say Obama won the election fair and sqaure. They say no, they refuse to recognize that. They will, if necessary, secede from the sandbox and form their own nations. They will be gun nations, which are very similar in philosophy and practice to Islamic nations. You have to live by their rules or be stoned or, in this case, shot to death.
The one piece of scripture they have lifted from the Bill of Rights is that the Second Amendment trumps anyone else's right not to live surrounded by the means of violence and destruction. At some point, throwing sand and shit in each other's eyes is not enough and you have to start using the toys in your battles. A few misguided souls do not understand the principle of fear, inequaity, and the pursuit of death. You have to be really dumb to live in the holy land that owns half of the world's guns and not understand that principle.
So here comes the prophet, Wayne LaPierre, from the NRA, the vatican of the nation, to say nobody had better fuck with the sacrament. The way to settle any arguments in the sand box that escalate into an exchange of fire with the toys is to shoot the bastards. So, in this time when a large portion of his caucus, as they like to call the sand box congregation, is calling for the cutting of medicaid, food stamps, and other means of survival, he wants Congress to appropriate enough money to put an armed police officer in every school. This idea contends with those who want to arm the teachers. The flaw in that idea is that some teacher might get caught with a piece of chalk in his or her hand when someone strays from the sand box and decides to shoot up the school kids. To prevent such incidents, you have to be diligent and have that gun at the ready at all times and not get distracted and diverted by any silliness such as trying to educate children.
I wonder when we get to go to the gun vatican and kiss Wayne's 30-round clip.
My neighbor got rid of his kid's sand box because the neighborhood cats thought it was an outdoor comfort station erected for their convenience.
Cats are a lot smarter than people.